We’ll keep things simple today—I would merely like to educate you by presenting ten fun facts you probably didn’t know about me and my fellow weasels.
Get ready for The Wezel Lowdown:
1. I like to match my outfits with the season—in the summer I don a brownish coat but in the winter I prefer all white. If I’m feeling especially fancy, I can do a bright lavender color under ultraviolet light.
2. My favorite foods are rabbits, ground squirrels, pika, birds, frogs, and rats.
3. Don’t get on my bad side—if I bite you, you’re in trouble and better start making friends with some monkeys, as they are the only ones who secrete the antidote that you must take within 24 hours.
4. I am a vision of manliness—I can feed on animals five times my size.
5. I have a diversified skill set, as I can both swim and climb.
6. Sleep is for the weak—I’m going all day and all night.
7. My claim to fame: I am the smallest carnivorous mammal in the world. You can pack a lot of punch into 6 inches, which is yet another reason to stay on my good side.
8. My excellent figure is good for more than just attracting the ladies—the long slender physique is perfect for maneuvering small spaces. Those mice think they’re so smart until I follow them straight into their burrow.
9. I love to eat (as in I eat around a third of my body weight everyday).
10. Warning: If I like you, I’ll make a low trilling sound. If I don’t like you, I’ll make a loud chirping sound. Just keep that in mind.